In the years since we last saw John and Ted, they're both still living the dream in Boston. Although John is now a bachelor, Ted has settled down with Tami-Lynn, the trashy woman of his dreams. As marital problems begin to affect the newlyweds, Ted and Tami-Lynn decide to have a baby in order to save their marriage. Their hopes are crushed when the Commonwealth of Massachusetts declares Ted to be not a person, but property, and therefore ineligible to adopt. He is fired from his job at the grocery store and summarily informed that his marriage has been annulled. Angry and dejected, Ted channels his frustration and asks his best pal to help him sue the state and win him the rights that he deserves. They enlist a young, medical-marijuana aficionada named Samantha L. Jackson as their lawyer and head to court. But when Ted loses his case, the three must venture on a road trip to New York in a last-ditch effort to persuade legendary civil rights attorney Patrick Meighan to take on their appeal. If they win, they will prove that Ted is not just a beer-swilling, pot-infused, stuffed teddy bear, but actually a person who deserves the same freedoms as any other beer-swilling, pot-infused American.